We Are Not Alone
I was diagnosed with breast cancer shortly after Thanksgiving, 2008. My first trip to the surgeon's office is a blur to me. Although the doctor explained everything very thoroughly, I could not hear a word he said. Fortunately, he wrote everything down for me, and although just as stunned by the news as I, my husband was able to grasp most of the important parts.
I was scheduled to have a lumpectomy on January 17, 2009. The time between my diagnosis and the operation felt like an eternity, but it did give me the opportunity to do some research and prepare myself. One of the difficulties of being diagnosed with cancer is that you don't know anything about the disease and you don’t know what questions to ask your doctors. The first thing I did was to go on line and access information from the Breast Cancer Network of Strength (formerly Y-Me National Breast Cancer Org.). One of the most helpful parts of the Web site was called: Every Woman’s Guide to Breast Cancer.? Written in layman’s terms, this guide gave detailed information on many aspects of my disease. I went to the American Cancer Society website for additional help, and I was able to find some good books at the library. I began to feel that I was getting a handle on the medical procedures and the mysterious terminology involved in my care. This empowered me.
Right before my surgery I began to experience a tremendous sense of vulnerability and lack of emotional control. A nagging fear began to taunt me and a voice inside my head told me I was alone. Somehow, from a place deep in my spirit, I was able to push the voice back, and as I began to share my situation with family and friends, a community of supporters began to form around my husband and me. Neighbors offered to drive me to appointments or bring meals to the house, people called or sent notes of encouragement, others prayed for me. In the midst of all this, two of my friends who were breast cancer survivors took me under their wings in a very special way. They, as no one else could, knew what I was going through, not only physically, but emotionally. Being able to talk with them without feeling I had to hold anything back was and still is a tremendous support.
About a month after my surgery, and right before my radiation treatments began, I felt the need for a different kind of support; something that would benefit my whole being. Once again I went to the Internet where I discovered that a hospital just a few miles from my home offered a free program called Cancer Life Net to county residents. Staffed by compassionate professionals and generous volunteers, the program provided many services including support groups, physical therapies, counseling, and even financial aid to cancer patients and their families. Accessing this excellent resource helped me navigate through the next stages of my recovery.
Being diagnosed with breast cancer puts us on a road that no one wants to go down, but it might just be a journey that lets us discover who we really are: strong, resilient women; women who have much to give, women who are part of a sisterhood of courage. Cancer is mean; it wants us to believe we are alone; together, we can face it and call it a liar. Together, we can take back our lives.
Marie Edmeades
May, 2009
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